I once heard someone say that they realized that they treated other people the way they treated themselves.  I realized that I do too…if I am critical of myself, impatient with myself, berate myself for making mistakes, beat myself up for making the same mistakes and call myself names; then that is exactly what I do to others.  I only have the capacity to love others as I first love myself.

God’s word tells us this concept in Matthew 22:36-39 when Jesus is asked what is the greatest commandment.  He replies to love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul and mind and to love your neighbor as yourself.  If I don’t ever love myself, then how can I love another?

How do I know if I am loving myself?  The world tells us that to love ourselves is to indulge ourselves, to do what our flesh wants to do, what feels good to us, whatever we want whenever we want. While I may find temporary enjoyment from these things, I think that the ‘love verses’ from 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 give me a good list of questions to know how God wants me to love myself. 

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Am I patient and kind with myself?  Am I rude to myself?  Am I easily angered with myself?  Do I forgive myself?  Do I keep a record of all my mistakes and keep reliving them and beat myself up over them?  Am I honest with myself?  Do I protect myself, trust in God working through me?  Do I hope in the future God has for me and do I persevere even when I make a mistake?  As I look at this list of questions I know that in the past I often haven’t loved myself very well.  I am grateful that now I have a way to see God’s idea of love in my life and the awareness to ask for His Spirit to help me love myself in a way that’s honoring to Him. I know I can’t do this on my own, and that as I surrender more to Him I will receive God’s love better which will flow from me as loving myself and others better as well.

Practice for Today

When I choose to love myself I am receiving God’s love.  Loving myself is like making a deposit in a bank account.  By making deposits into this account I am giving myself the ability to make withdrawals loving others.  If I never deposit anything I never have anything to give.  Today I will do at least one thing to love myself.

Matthew 22:36-39  “Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?”  And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.  This is the great and first commandment.  And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.