I struggle to find balance in my life. Balancing work, life, home, and recreation seems like a full time job. Last week I was really having a hard time, it seemed I had so much to do and not enough hours in a day. I was trying to figure out how to do the things I wanted to do and the things I should do or need to get done. I find there is never enough time for it all and then add in trying to find balance in my behaviors. It seems as though I become aware of unhealthy patterns, such as saying yes when I mean no or saying I am good with whatever when I really am not, I realize that I want to stop doing that and I swing to the other side of the pendulum. Maybe by saying no to everything or just plain avoidance of those kinds of circumstances altogether. Other times with priorities, I choose to only do the things that I want to do, which may feel good in the moment but causes me stress later when I’m up against a deadline. It is frustrating that I can’t manage to land on that peaceful center spot of the teeter totter and stay there, but perhaps God did not intend for me to find balance or figure it out.

As I ponder and study the Bible looking for those concepts, I am really at a loss. I can’t seem to find a teaching of Jesus where He tells His disciples their lives need balance. I would maybe even argue that the life He calls them to is exactly the opposite. Also, I don’t recall Jesus saying figure it out and if I consider the things He says to look and search for; I believe it is only Him, His Kingdom and righteousness, and His will. I think that as I expose the idea of balance to Jesus’ light, I find that perhaps the idea of balance is a worldly idea and a wrong belief that is based on my longing for control and my desire to get my priorities straight. Did He ever intend for us to balance “worldly” priorities? Not that God doesn’t ask me to have priority, He does…but it is only Him. It is about seeking Him first, abiding in Him, dying to myself, and surrendering to Him and His will. While I have been a believer for a long time, I find that perhaps I haven’t completely believed the meaning of John 3:16 belief, which is to trust in, cling to, and rely on. Maybe I haven’t always chosen to love Him with the same reckless abandon He loves me by abiding in Him, proclaiming I surrender all!

I think that surrender is what allows God to bring His balance into my life. I choose to prioritize the one thing that really matters, Him, and seek His will by abiding in Him. We are told in John to abide with Jesus and He abides with us providing a peace in our souls. This is the peace of balance that I am seeking. The word abide means to stay, continue, endure, be present, and to dwell. For me to do this with Jesus it requires time, attention, and constant conversation, fostering our relationship. Then in dying to myself and humbly asking for His leading moment by moment, God provides direction that puts all my other priorities in order and helps me align my actions and decisions with my values and beliefs, rather than being driven by external pressures or my people-pleasing tendencies which provides peace and clarity. As I practice this discipline of abiding in Him, dying to self, and surrender; I find that I shift my perspective to Him, acknowledging that His power is at work in me and releasing the need for control. God begins to lead me step by step and my heart begins to align with His. I can let go completely in surrender, trusting in His plan, and feel His peace rather than the stress and anxiety that comes with trying to control every aspect of my life. 

Practice for Today

As I look at all of the things I need to do today, I will surrender my day by putting God first and allowing Him to shape this day knowing that He will align everything else in my life.  May I always choose to stay attached to Jesus, the vine who allows me to abide in Him and bear fruit. I will remember that each day I do this fosters trust in God’s plan and a sense of peace and acceptance even in the face of adversity and uncertainty which is God’s balance in my life. 

John 15:4-5     Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me.

Matthew 6:33     But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

Proverbs 3:5-6    Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.

In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.