While I would like to think that I am a courteous person, I can struggle with some of the attributes of courtesy, such as respect, consideration, cooperation and generosity to others. Sometimes it comes naturally to me, like when a complete stranger needs help or my neighbor who I help catch her dog. Other times it is not as easy, like when a person pretends I don’t exist or someone cuts me off in traffic. While it seems it should be simple, I often find that I struggle most to offer courtesy to the ones who are closest to me. It seems as though when considerations are involved with the people I love most, I often don’t even ask or ponder the other person’s perspective, assuming I know what they feel and thinking they will understand. I know that being courteous as a matter of daily living is what God wants for me and will greatly improve all of my relationships and interactions with others. Practicing courtesy cannot depend on the actions and reactions of others, but rather is a conscious choice. As I embark on this journey, I am reminded of a powerful Bible verse that serves as a guiding light for my actions and interactions with others: “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you” (Ephesians 4:32). This verse encapsulates the essence of courtesy and provides a roadmap for navigating the challenges of everyday life by starting with looking at Jesus and following His leading.

Jesus, the embodiment of love, serves as the ultimate example for me. His life was marked by humility, selflessness, and a genuine concern for and acceptance of others, no matter their life or their story. He treated others with respect and kindness, even when their actions didn’t deserve it. As I look to Jesus as the cornerstone of my faith, I know that these attributes of His are the only starting point by which I can begin to extend courtesy to the people around me. As I have gone through my life, my mind has been shaped by my life experiences, so I tend to see my life and experiences as right which lends itself towards a prideful perspective. In 1 Peter 5:5, we are told to clothe ourselves with humility toward one another. Humility is something I can choose to put on every day and ask God to grow in me. It is only in this humility that I can even begin to see and respect that others are unique and distinctly separate people. From this place of humility, I can begin to accept myself and others exactly as they are, which affords me the opportunity to offer love and compassion. I can recognize that another person has their own life experiences that are different from my own and may see things differently than I do. I don’t have to agree with their perspective, however, I recognize that as God’s creation, they have their own mind, soul and set of emotions that I need to respect and offer courtesy to as another person created in His image.

As people we all need consideration and the verse from Ephesians reminds me of the immense kindness and compassion that God has shown toward me, as well as the importance of forgiveness. He has forgiven me countless times, loved me unconditionally and accepted me even when I was far from Him. Just as God has forgiven me, I am called to forgive others. Choosing courtesy means letting go of grudges, releasing resentment, and offering forgiveness freely. It is through forgiveness that relationships can be mended, wounds can heal, and true courtesy can flourish. It is with these profound understandings that I can accept others in humility and extend the same kindness, compassion and forgiveness I have been so freely given. This allows me to approach every interaction with a genuine desire to understand, empathize, and uplift those around me with courtesy and respect.

Practice for Today

Choosing courtesy can be a radical act of love that is a powerful testimony to our faith and a reflection of our commitment to live like Jesus according to God’s Word. While offering courtesy is not always easy, especially when I am faced with intense emotions or difficult people, I can choose to clothe myself in humility and acceptance and take the time to ask questions and actively listen. Ephesians 4:32 serves as a constant reminder of what God has shown me and calls me to extend the same courtesy to others which can be contagious. I remember that courtesy is not dependent on external factors, but rather a choice I can make in the moment. As I venture on this journey, I will draw strength from Christ’s example and rely on prayer, as well as God’s guidance and grace in every interaction to find the strength and inspiration to always be courteous, no matter the circumstances. May my actions reflect the love and grace that I have received, and may courtesy become a transformative force in my life and in the lives of those around me.

Ephesians 4:32     Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.

Colossians 3:12-14     Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.